Although this is quite a personal blog post to write, I thought it might be useful to someone out there reading this as I know I personally found it easier knowing that people also experienced the same problems as myself. I also thought that this blog post, fits in perfectly for those who are preparing to sit exams, as I know that this is a stressful period, for myself aswell – as I currently have lots of deadline at University.
If you didn’t know already, I suffer with anxiety and stress. I hate that mental heath is such a taboo subject and there are many out there that simply don’t understand and merely pass it off as something to “get over”.
I first noticed that I struggled dealing with stress whilst sitting my GCSE exams at Secondary School, I would stay up all night revising and revising, until I’d literally fall asleep in my books. And before you say that I clearly hadn’t prepared well enough, this was not the case,I started studying and revising about 2 months before my exams; I had a timetable, countless checklists to make sure that I covered everything. To be fair, I came out with really good grades but the stress that I put myself through seems unbelievable looking back.
My next serious episode, was again caused by exam pressure whilst studying for my A-levels, however I tried to remember back to my GCSE’s and tried to cope and deal with this better. I only told some of my close friends how I was feeling, and I am eternally grateful for their support. My panic attacks became so bad that I wouldn’t want to do anything or go out to see anyone, and looking back now I feel like I wasted so much time!
However, since this, I have learnt to handle these situations, and know how to stop myself reaching what seems like “breaking-point”. I’ve learnt to talk about whatever I’m worrying about even if it to me it seems something so small. Talking to people really helps, a problem shared is a problem halved – and I’ve learnt this the hard way. I’ve also found that taking breaks away from the situation, whether it be a little walk and having a breather always helps.
I still face little battles, whether it be deciding whether or not to go to a social engagement, going to new places but I’ve learnt that Anxiety will not rule me, and taking baby steps really helps. It’s always important to treat these break-throughs as achievements. I know that it’s hard talking to someone who doesn’t understand anxiety, but talking about it really does help and trust me it lifts a huge weight off your shoulders.
Writing this blog post and thinking about actually posting this gives me anxiety in itself, as to me I’m breaking the persona that people know me to be. However, I feel that it’s an important subject to talk about, and seeing others talk about their problems is a guidance to helping others now and in the future.
Thank you for reading, and I hope this helps someone somewhere.